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1-2-3-4,…

edited August 2016 in Growth & Parenting
Originally when I was younger I always wanted 5 children, not sure why I just imagined it would be great to have that many.

Then I met my husband and we have decided to have 2-3 babies.

After having our first little boy about 8 month ago we have change our minds again and have agreed that one would be fine for us. We can give all our attention to him and make sure he gets everything that he needs. We don’t want to stop going on holidays and weekends away so in a way it was a selfish decision but one that our boy will profit from as well.

What was your plan if any and how did it work out in the end?

Mumofone

Comments

  • I had just a little brother when I was younger, so I have always wanted more than 2 children, a big family. After meeting my husband we decided to have 3 - 4 children. Now that we are having our third child and I think it's enough.
  • I can't remember how many kids I wanted as a child, but I would like to have another one after this baby. Bringing total children in my household to 4, but my biological children to only 2. I actually think this is the best of both worlds: 4 children without having to give birth 4 times!
  • Having more kids can never affect your holidays and weekends plans. Rather they will enjoy more if they have a company. I have 2 kids and they enjoy being with one another. We go for holidays and vacations. Its true that you have to take care when they are babies. My boys are like 1.5 years age difference. Though it was an accident to have a second kids so early, now I feel that it was good. They grew up together and learned to share everything both things and thoughts.

    Giving to much attention on one baby can spoil him/her. Babies will have only small needs. But as they grow up their needs also grow. They will ask for something that we can never accept. Hence you should not grant all his unnecessary needs even though he cries or shouts or scroll for that.
  • A friend of mine...initially wanted to have only 1 child though her husband wanted two. She also wanted to give full attention to her son, granted all his wishes, never scolded him for anything he does. I have seen her blaming other kids if something bad happens while they were playing.

    He is 5 years now and is a spoiled brat. Other parents are scared to let their child play with him. He gets punished regularly in the kindergarten.

    He is very absent minded or careless that don't even know that something that he is doing can hurt others or himself. There is no one to correct him. I will never blame the kid.

    Now they are having a second child and he doing the same with the baby. Pulling his ears and nose etc. Now my friend and she told me that she don't know how to correct him.
  • Wow Ganga! I think it's very important to grow up in a close family or community if you're a child with other children. Even if you are an only child, you can learn to have empathy for others if you are used to problem solving and different personalities that happen with all the situations that come up from a diverse environment, with diverse interactions.

    I have seen children like this too. I don't understand it. I would be happy to correct my child if they do something wrong. I have talked some parents who never admit their child has ever done anything wrong.
  • That's the problem...Some parents feel that correcting or scolding the child for what they have done will hurt the child and they will lose the love towards the parents.
  • Exactly...
  • I think it's very useful to have siblings to grow up with, hopefully they are close in age, but even when they're not it can be very beneficial for the kids to learn to have different relationships and work together with different personality types. Being lonely and playing by yourself too often can make it difficult to bond with others as an adult and ask for help if you need it. I had to work hard to be able to open myself up to people when I got older. I was just comfortable being alone too often.
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